Tennessee Heat Page 8

  She got so caught up in her thoughts she didn’t realize the curtain had left a small gap and she was now semi exposed. Something she knew to avoid no matter that she was still relatively safe inside.

  Suddenly a dark form stepped in front of the open window and she gave a little shriek and almost toppled off the twin-sized bed in her fright.

  “Who’s there?” she asked, not quite able to make out the person since it had grown dark.

  “It’s me Anna,” was the answer.

  There was only one person who ever called her that. She wasn’t sure if to be annoyed or not at the intrusion, but it was too late to escape his notice now.

  “Tim?” her voice was barely above a whisper, tinged with apprehension as it was. She wasn’t exactly sure that it was he after all. But the voice did sound like his.

  “Yes!” Now she was able to better see him, but just barely, as he stepped a little bit closer. Seeing him brought back memories of the day before and she remembered she hadn’t properly thanked him.

  “You trying to give me a heart attack or what? What’re you doing sneaking up on me like that? And how the heck did you even know I was here?” She did feel a little annoyed at being disturbed from the first peaceful moment she’d had here in way too long.

  She felt a little bad for scolding him when he hung his head like a whipped little boy. He fumbled and grumbled his way even closer to the window where there was more light. Now she could make out his light blonde hair in the coming moonlight though she still couldn’t make out his features.

  Tim was not a bad looking guy, and she knew he liked her, but she just wasn’t into him that way. She would’ve liked to be his friend, but each time she tried he always tried to take things farther and then she’d draw back and away.

  She was hoping this time would be different though; that he’d gotten the message the last time she turned him down. She was getting tired of the back and forth at any rate.

  He didn’t say anything, just stood there as if he was studying her in the dark. “What's up?” She asked. Feeling just a little bit uncomfortable with his silence.

  She hated these awkward situations that they always found themselves in, and could almost wish that she’d been saved by anyone else but him. Then she wouldn’t feel like she owed him. Damn!

  “Let’s take a walk down by the lake Anna.” Oh boy she thought, here we go again.

  “No thanks, I don’t feel like coming outside. The damn mosquitoes will be feasting down there this time of night anyway!”

  It was as good an excuse as any she thought and had a ring of truth to it that even he could admit to. She felt the now familiar unease grow as she awaited his reply. Knowing that he wasn’t done.

  “Oh come on. Ever since you met those new friends of yours at that fancy school you’ve been giving me the brush off. It’s like you think they’re better than the rest of us or something.”

  She hated when he talked like that, like she’d thrown him over for something better. But the truth is she couldn’t keep fighting off his advances and his puppy dog look each time she turned him down.

  “Look, thanks for saving me yesterday…”

  “I don’t need you to thank me for that. I thought we were friends. I just wanna talk to you.” She hated even more that guilt-laden tone of his that always set her teeth on edge.

  He covered her hand with his on the windowsill and she quickly drew hers back as if she’d been burned. She hated unwanted touches; they always made her feel so violated and only served to raise her ire.

  “Well, you can say whatever you have to say here.” She was beginning to get annoyed at his persistence. Now she felt trapped. What if the next time he didn’t step in to help? If there ever was a next time.

  And she couldn’t forget the way he’d grabbed her and tried to kiss her even though he’d claimed it was all for show. No matter what, she was pretty sure it was a good bet she wouldn’t be taking any moonlit walks with him ever.

  She was trying to come up with a good excuse to close the window and escape when he broke the silence. And his words left her cold inside. The implications were just too much to ignore.

  “So who’s the guy that drove off with you the other night?” Annabelle drew in her breath. She didn’t think that anyone had seen that. How had he? Was he spying on her? Creep!

  “A friend why?” She went on the defensive since she didn’t have to answer to him and in fact resented him even asking as if he had a right to. This is why she never had much to do with him these days. She hated his attitude, as if he had a right to her in some way.

  “No reason,” he said, “just curious; geez what’s up with you why you all, you know like bitchy and stuff?” Of course, the usual fallback any time she speaks up in anyway. Why did I sit in this window? She thought.

  “I didn’t realize that that’s what I was doing. I thought I was minding my own business.” She tried to say it lightly so there would be no hard feelings. And was already growing tired of the effort once again.

  They both held an uncomfortable silence for the next few seconds, which seemed to drag on forever. She pretended a renewed interest in the stars as she felt his stare.

  “Why won't you come walk with me, Annabelle?” he asked, one last time.

  “No, Tim, I can’t.” She tried to soften the blow but knew it hadn’t worked when he just stood there looking at her with those puppy dog eyes that she’d been dreading, which she could now make out in the rising moonlight.

  “Annabel,” he said before looking away and down at the ground. He sounded miserable and her gut hurt a little because she knew where this was going.

  “What?” she asked when he didn't say anything more.

  “Come on, I need to ask you something.”

  “So go ahead and ask me.”

  “No not here please come with me.” He looked around as though expecting someone else to be eavesdropping on their conversation.

  “Tim I already told you, I am not going. Why do you keep asking, what is it that you have to say that’s so important?” Was he really that thick? When have I ever walked anywhere with him anyway? She thought as she tried to understand this new angle of his.

  “Come on Annabel you know how I feel about you, I’ve been trying to tell you for the longest time. Why won't you give me a chance? Is it because of my job? You know I'm not going to be there forever and besides you're not even going to go off to college, you know that's not gonna happen now, you lost your chance...”

  Tim regretted the words as soon as they left his lips but she made him so nuts. She gave him a look that would singe hair, but kept her lips closed, after all wasn’t he telling the truth?

  Nonetheless she regretted sharing that confidence with him on one of their rare polite conversations a few weeks ago, since he found it so easy to throw it back in her face.

  “Look I'm sorry I said that, that didn't come out right, I didn’t…you make me nuts. I don't even know what the hell I'm saying. Listen, are you seeing someone else?”

  “No,” she said, feeling just slightly guilty, like she’d just betrayed Chase’s trust or something. But she wasn’t in the mood to share that part of her with anyone around here. It would feel tainted somehow she thought.

  “So what is it then, what’s the big deal? Why can’t you just give me a shot?”

  “Tim, I just don’t feel that way about you I’m sorry.” Which is something I should’ve said a long time ago, she thought. And spared myself this embarrassment.

  Why should she feel guilty for turning him down? It’s not like she’d ever given him the impression that she was interested in anything but friendship. As soon as she’d realized where his mind was going, she’d begun distancing herself bit by bit in fact.

  But they were once friends and she hated the thought that he might even now be feeling all the things she’d felt in the past with Chase, the burn of unrequited love.

  She’d hoped that by now he would’ve found someone els
e to give his affections to. She hadn’t given him any encouragement and couldn’t imagine why the heck he hadn’t just given up long ago.

  “We could be so good together I know we could. Come on, say you’ll at least give it some thought.”

  “Tim why are you making this so difficult? I already told you I do not feel that way about you, Ok.”

  It was then she smelt his breath when he got too close. No wonder he was being such a hardheaded ass. “You’ve been drinking, you’re drunk.” Her lips curled in disgust.

  “Come on, I just had a few no big deal.” He shrugged his shoulders dismissively.

  “Yeah well I don’t know if you’ve noticed Tim, but I’ve had my quota of alcoholics for a lifetime.”

  “I'm nothing like your mother you know that come on, that was a cheap shot.”

  “Tim I'm sorry but seriously there's never going to be anything between you and I, not like that. You're…. we’re, you're my friend, you’re always going to be my friend and I really appreciate what you did the other day; but I don’t think that means I have to spend the rest of my life with you to thank you for it.”

  She felt like a bitch for saying it and the look on his face didn’t make her feel any better. “I’m sorry Tim, I’m just tired. Look, I’m just trying to be honest and not lose a friend in the bargain. If you keep doing stuff like this, it’s gonna put a wedge between us. I don’t want that, I really like you as a friend, but I’m not in love with you.”

  Please accept my word for it this time and drop it, she thought. He looked at her in the dark and though she couldn’t see his eyes any longer, she felt his…hurt?

  As if by providence her phone rang on the table across the room and she started pulling the window closed as she said a hurried goodbye. She all but forgot about him when she saw Chase’s name and number in the readout.

  “Hi.” Her voice sounded breathless and giddy even to her own ears and she bit her lip to rein it in. Her hand went back to that twirling hair thing as she plopped back on the bed, the night outside her window long forgotten.

  “Hi babygirl sorry it took me so long to get back to you, it’s been a long day. How are you doing, did you have a good day?”

  She tried brushing him off and turning the conversation back to him but he wasn’t having it. “Did you go outside today baby?” She heard the strain in his voice and knew what he was thinking.

  “No, I just hung around the house and cleaned up a little.” How lame, she thought. She couldn’t even think of what to say to him. She felt dumb as a stump.

  “When can I see you?” Just like that he switched topics, even the tone of his voice had changed. Her heart raced and she jackknifed on the bed to a sitting position.

  She’d love nothing more than to see him, but no way was he coming here now, not with everyone hanging around outside. She’d just die. Especially since she now knew that at least one person had seen him in the neighborhood.

  Then she remembered she had his money. “I’ll try to come see you some day this week.”

  “What’s wrong with tonight? Right now? Say the word and I’ll come get you.”

  “It’s kinda late and I’ve got work Tomorrow.” She knew it was a lame excuse, it was barely past eight o’clock, but she couldn’t think that quick on her feet, especially when he was turning her brain to mush.

  She was surprised when he gave in and settled for another long phone conversation that lasted until well into the night and early morning.

  He listened to the soft sounds of sleep on the other end of the line and wondered since when he found such things adorable. He could’ve gladly stayed up listening to her but he too soon gave in to tiredness and fell asleep.

  When she woke the next morning and realized what she’d done, and that the line was still open, she held her breath. Somehow she knew that he was awake as well. “Good morning sleepyhead.”

  “Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry, I fell asleep. What time is it?” She spoke really fast so he’d not catch on to what his voice first thing in the morning was doing to her.

  “Six o’clock.” Had he stayed awake all this time listening to her sleep? Can’t be.

  “Tell me you didn’t sit there all night listening to me snore.” Oh please don’t let me have been snoring, she thought. “You make the cutest little sounds when you sleep.”

  She groaned with embarrassment and tried to think of something funny to say but once again her mind blanked out on her.

  “I need to see you soon Annabelle, if you don’t come to me, I’ll come for you. In fact I prefer it that way. Let me come get you. Or you can come here right after work, I’ll have the doorman let you in.”

  “I don’t know Chase can I think about it?”

  “Baby, if you’re afraid that I’m going to force you to do anything you’re not ready for, just don’t. I want you, that’s no big secret, but I want more from you than just a quick fuck, so try to relax okay.”

  Her face burned from his use of the word, but she made her voice strong and sure when she gave him her answer. It was so much easier having this conversation with him than it had been the night before with Tim.

  Instead of threatened and slightly disgusted she felt a sweet tingle that had her squeezing her legs together. And put a big stupid smile on her face that she couldn’t begin to hide even as she blushed. Thank heavens she was alone in her room.

  He stayed on the phone with her until they both needed to get ready for work. “Baby! you remember what I told you right? Call me if you need me. I don’t care what the reason, big or small. I’m right here.”

  “I will!” Her face hurt she was smiling so wide.

  “Promise me.” He couldn’t get that news report out of his head. Each second she was in that place he was in his own personal hell.

  It wasn’t lost on him that she was the most important person in his life right now and he couldn’t do what he wanted to, to protect her. That’s not the kind of man he is. Not who he was raised to be.

  He’d told himself more than once since the other night that if she made him wait too long, he was going there to get her anyway. He already knew that the moment she becomes his in every sense of the word she’d never set foot back there.

  He’s just biding his time. Waiting for that blessed moment, and then his babygirl is in for a surprise. For now he said nothing about his secret plans. She’d learn soon enough. “You haven’t answered Annabel, I said promise me.”

  “Okay, I promise.” She swallowed hard around the lump in her throat at the way his caring made her feel. “Okay sweet face, hang up for me.” They played their new game of having to say bye three times before one of them actually hung up.

  It was the first morning in a long while that she actually climbed out of bed with a sweet disposition. The last few days have been some of the best she could remember and if she allowed herself to believe him, they would only get better.

  She was leaning towards believing him, she was so tempted to take a chance, to just close her eyes and jump right in. He made her want to take risks that she’d always shied away from. Only she wasn’t too sure that that was a good thing.

  But each time she heard his voice a new kind of hope seemed to envelope her. She could almost feel a glow as she hopped into the shower, still with his voice whispering in her ear. “Oh you have it bad girl.”

  12

  Annabel took extra special care with her dress that morning, something she hadn't done in a while; not since long before the party. Usually for work she’d throw on some old jeans and a ratty T-shirt.

  Nothing too horrible, at least passable, but today she took time to do her hair and makeup just in the off chance that she might see him.

  She didn’t even know if he knew where she worked, but remembered vaguely that she might have mentioned it once long ago. She heard her mother doing her usual mumbling and moaning from down the hall in her own room and rolled her eyes.

  Mornings were never fun in the Scacci home. It always
seemed that Ms. Scacci saved up all her woes and sorrows to greet the new day.

  Annabel, once she finished getting dressed for the day, took a deep breath before leaving her room to go face her mother. She wasn’t sure what this morning would hold, but she was hoping that the feeling that she had from the conversation with Chase would last at least until she made it out of the apartment. She should’ve known better

  She tiptoed into the kitchen being quiet in the off chance her mother wouldn’t hear her movements. She proceeded to get breakfast ready for both of them since her mother had been out late the previous night, hanging out with her friend.

  She could make out more of the grumbles and was only slightly perturbed to hear her mother complain about a headache. She knew what that meant.

  If her mother had indeed gone to Ms. Agnes’ she hadn’t spent all her time there. Only one thing makes her complain for headaches in the morning and it’s cheap liquor and beer.

  When the noise just kept growing Annabelle knew it was her mother’s way of getting her attention and resolved herself to going into her room to see what it was she really wanted. If there’s one thing Annabelle knows it’s that her mother’s remedy for headaches is more alcohol.

  “Oh, my head!” she was saying, as she pressed her hands to either side of her forehead, rocking back and forth on the bed. “I've got the worse fucking headache again, and I’m supposed to be going in to work any minute. What am I gonna do? I don’t know why I always get these damn things first thing every morning.”

  Annabelle could’ve told her how but knew that would only lead to an argument, which she wasn’t in the mood for. Instead she decided to play along so this new drama could play itself out and she could get on with the rest of her day.

  “You'd better go to the hospital mother.” She rolled her eyes as she said it because this was not the first time those words had left her lips, in much the same scenario. In fact she’s been playing out this same scene in some variation or another for as long as she could remember.